INVADER ZIM!

 

 “What’s wrong with you? All you talk about is aliens and ghosts and seeing Bigfoot in your garage!” – The Letter M. For two years, 2001-2003, a large number of people lodged pencils in their brains, collected piggies (PIGGIES!) sang the “Doom Song,” and ran around in circles shouting “WEE!” The reason for this apparent mental break? Invader Zim! Invader Zim first aired on the 30th of March, 2001, on Nickelodeon, becoming an instant cult classic, thanks to its peculiar brand of humour, twisted plots, grotesque and fantastic characters, and all round sense of “WTF!” “Bwahahaha. Inferior human organs!” – Zim. For the dozen or so of you, who have never watched ZIM. I shall give you a brief background […]

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STAR TREK: MONDAY 29

 

 “Do you really think a child like this poses any threat to me? I’ve been fighting worse battles since the day I was born. When the doctors said I wouldn’t live past my first year, I proved them wrong. Even when my parents thought I was too sickly to be worth caring for, I survived on the streets. Even when my own ungrateful subjects forced me into exile, I refused to accept defeat. I certainly won’t surrender to this little girl! ” – Kes. Guess what?! Give up? I’ll tell you. This week is even slower than last week. Seems we’ve run out of Star Trek Voyager memes. “Why does it bother you so much when I call you ‘Doctor’? […]

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STAR TREK: MONDAY 28

 

 “It was after their marriage ended. She pulled me out of the Federation school, in order to teach me… honor and discipline.” – Torres. Well it was bound to happen sooner or later. After seconds of strenuous labour, I’ve managed to locate only ONE! B’Elanna Torres meme. Who knew? So let us have a quick look at it, and move on with our lives. “That’s an absurd example.” – Torres. And here it is. The B’Elanna Torres “Fap Fap Fap Fap Guy!” meme.| Thrill a minute stuff? Let us look into the history of the “Fap Fap Fap Fap Guy.” Originating from a “Now Kiss” rage comic titled “Principal Creepy.” It was submitted by KingGawjuss on the 16th of February, […]

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QUINTEN NUTT!

 

 “Bisolar: Acrylic on Canvas.” (Titles of his artwork.) Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more. Today we speak to an up and coming local artist who is pushing boundaries and stirring the pot of cultural enlightenment. Today we speak to Quinten Nutt. Now some of you may be familiar with his work: his abstract style, surreal aesthetic, free-form brush strokes, innovative cultural exploration… all of which is coated in a sense of openness and true accessibility… making Quinten a unique and thought provoking individual. I consider him the vanguard of the new Avant-Garde. So come with us, as we wade into the depths of his mind. “Esoteric painting: Individual’s life tree with planetary symbols, life and karmic numbers and […]

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OSOMBIE.

 

 Corey Sevier (Immortals, North Shore.) Well, well, well. Just when you thought American cinema couldn’t get anymore patriotic… or zombie filled, Hollywood surprises you. Last year, 2012, saw the release of Osombie – the undead, Osama bin Laden, film. Yes, you read that correctly, a bin Laden Zombie film. Who knew? Made on a shoestring budget, and filled with forgettable faces, Osombie personifies B-movie culture.  Eve Mauro (Zombies VS Strippers, Dragon Lore: Curse of the Shadow.) The film revolves around Dusty (Eve Mauro) a yoga instructor, who heads to Afghanistan to rescue her conspiracy-theorist brother Derek (Jasen Wade.) Joined by a team of NATO soldiers… mostly Americans (So much for the grand Coalition.) Dusty finds her brother and a lot […]

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GHOSTBUSTERS!

 

  “Do you believe in UFOs, astral projections, mental telepathy, ESP, clairvoyance, spirit photography, telekinetic movement, full trance mediums, the Loch Ness monster and the theory of Atlantis?” – Ghostbusters. Last week we looked at the Gremlins, this week we look at another cult series that began the same weekend as Gremlins… on the very same day in fact. That’s right, on 8th June, 1984, Ghostbusters stepped out of the supernatural shadows and claimed its place on the world stage. Within a matter of weeks they had both become ’80’s cultural icons… and even now, thirty years later, they remain as two of the most influential film series of all time. For those who have not seen Ghostbusters, I shall adumbrate… […]

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GREMLINS!

 

 “For one thing, we’re insured for the damages. For another, maybe it wasn’t a place for people anyway. It was a place for things. You make a place for things… things come.” – Gremlins 2. In 1984, the world of “cute” was forever changed as Gizmo arrived on the cinema circuit and stole our hearts, our chicken and our life savings. “Gizmo Caca” – Gremlins. Written by Chris Columbus (Mrs. Doubtfire, Harry Potter 1+2;) produced by Steven Spielberg (Jaws, E.T;) and directed by Joe Dante (Small Soldiers, CSI-NY.)  This medium budget ($11-million) black-comedy became an instant cult-classic and made close to $150-million in box-office profits alone. FUN FACT: Chris Columbus got the idea for Gremlins from stories told by WW2 […]

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LEXX!

 

 “I am Kai, last of the Brunnen-G. Millennia ago, the Brunnen-G led humanity to victory in the war against the Insect civilization. The Time Prophet predicted that I would be the one to destroy the Divine Order and the League of 20,000 Planets. Some day, that will happen… but not today, as today is my day of death. The day our story begins.” – Kai. This article is not for the squeamish, the sensitive, those with pink hair, or those who only live for big budget, six-pack fueled, romance driven, science-fiction TV shows. This TV series, Lexx, represents everything that is glorious about complete and utter wonderful nonsense. Made on a shoe-string budget, staring lesser known Canadian and British stage […]

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Underwater Monsters!

 

 “Gavin to Adante: “So you’re proof that sea monsters really do exist?” – Jasmine Angell, Luminous. Forget Jaws! Bugger, Deep Blue Sea! Ignore, The Beast! And pay no heed to the Creature of the Black Lagoon! For today, we delve into the very depths of the oceans; today we explore every crevice on the sea floor; today we look past every piece of sea-weed; today… we find the worst creatures that the “big blue wet thing” has ever ejaculated into the human world. Today we look at bad underwater monster films. “He deliberately left you your boat because he wants to fight you alone on the sea.” – Orca. For those of you who haven’t seen these films, fear not, […]

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DOCTOR WHO: 50th Anniversary.

 

 “The universe is big. It’s vast and complicated and ridiculous. And sometimes, very rarely, impossible things just happen and we call them miracles.” — The Doctor, Season 5, Episode 12. What did you do last Saturday night? Hopefully you did something constructive, something fun, something uniquely sexual? If not, then I hope you joined the millions of Doctor Who, Science-Fiction, Whovians (I loathe that term;) geeks and nerds who watched the Guinness World Record setting, Doctor Who: 50th Anniversary show… The Day of The Doctor. “You want weapons? We’re in a library! Books! The best weapons in the world!” — The Doctor, Season 2, Episode 2. For those of you who missed it, here’s a bit of brief recap and […]

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