MASS EFFECT: BOOK SERIES

 

 MASS EFFECT: BOOK SERIES I decided to do something different for this article. I thought that I would discuss with you – fans – the Mass Effect: Book Series. Now if you are like me – M.E Fanatic – then you would no doubt of heard of the Mass Effect: Book Series. I shall attempt to give YOU a brief synopsis, and my personal feelings regarding each book. “And so it begins.” – Oleg Petrovsky. But first. Let us look at the authors: Canadian, Drew Karpyshyn wrote the first three books in the series. He has written novels for several other video-game titles: Baldur’s Gate, and Star Wars. He also works as a scriptwriter, video-game scenario writer, and novelist. American, […]

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DLC: Quality VS Quantity?

 

 Do you remember the 1990’s, and the early 2000’s? I do. I remember the glory days of purchasing video-game expansion packs. The thrill of taking the box off of the shelf; the delight in purchasing it; the anticipation of opening the box; the overwhelming joy as you removed the CD case, manual, and other contents; the joy of installing a proven product that added more to your game. I miss those days. DOWNLOADABLE: Over the past few years the world has become more connected, and marginalized. We no longer have to leave our homes to purchase items. Films, music, games, even food and other services can be easily purchased on the internet. But with all this convenience there comes a […]

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ZOMBIES: Fact, fiction, or theoretical possibility? PART 3

 

 “I’d rather die while I’m living than live while I’m dead. ”  – Jimmy Buffett. It’s Wednesday and that means zombies. Last week we had a brief look at some of the best/worst zombie films and video-games in the 21st century. Today we shall carry on down the undead rabbit hole. “What’s with the zombie craze? Zombies are half alive, half dead, right? Sounds like my wife in bed.” – Jarod Kintz, Who Moved My Choose?   TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY: PART 4. The first true medium of self expression – apart from cave walls – books have given us an inexhaustible amount of zombie related goodness. Over the past few decades, dozens of “new” zombie films have been released, crawling their […]

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FTL: Faster Than Light.

 

 FASTER: On the 14th of September, 2012, a game was released that brought back a number of great RTS traditions. That game is FTL. FTL is a rogue-like space simulator; in which player takes COMPLETE command/control of a single customizable space vessel – Star Trek/Firefly –  as they attempt to navigate their way back home. Of course they are hounded by enemy forces as they go. “In any given episode of those classic shows, the captain is always yelling “Reroute power to shields!” or giving commands to the engineer now that their Warp Core is on fire. We wanted that experience, as opposed to the “dog fighting in space” that most video-games focus on. We wanted a game where we […]

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STAR TREK: MONDAY 6

 

 “Can we start by burying you?” – Captain Pike. And so we arrive at the last. The first captain of the U.S.S Enterprise. The last captain on our memes list. The man. The myth. The compulsive “beeper” – let me hear a drum roll for – Captain Christopher Pike. As you can imagine, Captain Pike, memes are the hardest memes to locate. They are rarer than peace, and worth more than gold-pressed latinum. (Scratch that last piece.) “Now you’re beginning to talk like a doctor, bartender.” – Captain pike. Now the few, Pike memes, that exist come in one of two formats. Both of which are classic de-motivationals. In the first type, we find Captain Pike, usually accompanied by a […]

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HEAVY METAL: FRANCHISE.

 

 “There was no way I was gonna walk around this place with my dork hanging out!” – Den. HEAVY METAL: 36 years on. Have you watched the “Heavy Metal” films, read the magazines, played the game? You haven’t! Well, you must rectify that at once. Since 1 April, 1977, Heavy Metal magazine and all its offspring have been thrilling the world with tales of horror, science-fiction, good old fashioned adventure stories and pictures of semi-naked warrior ladies. Over the course of this – long – article we shall look back over the past 38 years of the Heavy Metal franchise. The reason it is called, Heavy Metal? Well, that’s simple. Heavy Metal music: Black Sabbath, Devo, and Grand Funk Railroad […]

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ZOMBIES: Fact, fiction, or theoretical possibility? PART 2

 

 “I love zombies. If any monster could Riverdance, it would be zombies.” – Graig Ferguson. Welcome back to the land of unlife. Last week we looked into the wonderful world of zombies: from their humble beginnings, to their cultural impact. This week we carry on with all things zombie, as we delve into the 21st century, and take a look at how the undead have become a mainstay of our world. “I will not negotiate with the undead!” – David Wellington, Monster Island. TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY: PART 1. Since the dawn of the 21st century human beings have become more obsessed with zombies than almost any other supernatural or mythological creations. Books, films, comics, games, TV shows, all now feature zombies […]

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THE TOP FIVE: WORST VIDEO GAME FILMS 2000 – 2010.

 

 “Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more.” – Shakespeare. Recently we looked to the 1990’s for video-game films so horrifically produced, that they became glorious masterpieces of trash-cinema. So by now, you would think that after their horrific performances at the box office, the production of such ass-gravy would have been scrapped; replaced with nothing but magnificent odes to amazing games. But you’d be wrong. Since 2000 things have only gotten worse. Now we could be here for quiet some time, filling up volumes with arguments about which film is worse. But the truth is: THERE ARE TOO MANY TO NAME! So instead of arguing, this is what we are going to do. We are going to delve […]

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STAR TREK: MONDAY 5

 

 “Does your expertise on… sexual tension come from professional training or… firsthand experience?” – Captain Archer. As you can no doubt tell, WE are coming to the end of Star Trek – Captain – Mondays – though we are far from finishing all things Star Trek. This week we have a brief – very brief – look into the memes of the Enterprises first captain: Jonathan Archer. Archer memes are amongst the rarest Star Trek memes to find. They are so rare that they are almost non-existent. “That’s… never happened before.” – Captain Archer. RUBBING IT IN: Like all the previous memes we have looked at, de-motivational memes carry the day. However, unlike other Star Trek de-motivationals, Archers memes are […]

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VAMPIRE THE MASQUERADE: BLOODLINES

 

    “Police don’t have any suspects at this time, but they’re pretty sure that it was you.” -TV set. Damned security guard just shot me! Five bullets in the chest! Luckily for me and unluckily for him, a vampire cannot be felled by a few rounds fired from a ‘cap gun’. He seems to be backing away now. I think he has realised his mistake. Shame he is standing in front of the only exit. I suppose I shall have to deal with him… permanently. A myriad of choices present themselves to me. I could rush him, and tear him apart with claw, or axe, or any number of remorseless weapons; though that might be a bit excessive. I could […]

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